what you dont know you know

you'll miss it when its gone. old is gold. distance makes the heart grow fonder. you've all heard these phrases on so many occasions, many of them in the cheesiest of situations from very cheesy people (quite possibly me) but unless you've been in a situation like this, its impossible to know exactly how true these sayings really are. right, you go on a one week vacation and dont see your girlfriend for 9 days, great. you miss her, you think about her all the time, but its cool, you see her when you get back. in the meantime, you've got plenty to occupy you, family/other friends, activities etc. but when it comes to actually being isolated from all that you know, its a different ballgame. today is the first day/night that i've actually felt legitimately homesick, and boy, did it hit hard. i miss everything. i miss the days waking up to breakfast with heeeren and ricky back at school. i miss the weekend nights fucking around south with the whole crew. i miss ordering wings for sunday night football. i miss ranking on vishal for his flat jump shot. i miss seeing chris once every week with a stupid new story to tell me. i miss saying goodnight to brian every night. i miss it all, and you cant possibly know this until you've been put this far outside of your own comfort zone. most of all, everyone has someone that they can count on for almost anything, and when you dont have that person around, everything else becomes that much worse. for those of you that know me, i'm all about new experiences, about exploring the boundaries of my own experiences and expanding them as far as i can. however, it appears that i've got limits, just like any other human being, and ive realized exactly what the comforts of my own life back home mean to me. it makes getting up in the morning more difficult, it makes getting about my day that much more laborious, and definitely makes the nights, in the end, lonelier. for your own sake, you all, please dont take for granted what you experience on a daily basis. make an effort to realize exactly what your family, what your friends, and your own daily routines mean you to. they're mean more to you than you can possibly imagine. goodnight...